Thursday, July 16, 2009

I Want To Go To Heaven, Just Not Today

I am going to take tomorrow evening off of blogging. My husband and I have a ceremony to attend for his job. Rick and I have not been out, dressed up for a semi-formal thing in like.....forever. Well, at least 5 years. That feels like forever. We actually did go out on a couple of date nights in the last 5 years, but very very few. So, this will be fun. I hope.

As for tonight, my husband is feeling ill. He is resting now, so I get the comfort of the desktop. Yipppeee!

The children have been bonkers today. Mommy, this. Mommy, that. Mommy, Mommy, Mommy....
Help! Calgon take me awaaaayyyyy!

Who is this "mommy" character that everyone supposedly cannot live without?

Today I almost fell over a large toy Recycling truck that was on my kitchen floor. I was holding two plates of lunch items meticulously prepared for two special boys. After bearly saving myself from a catastrophic event, I angrily told the boys to pick up all the toys on the floor or they were not eating lunch. I know, it was not a great moment for me. A few seconds later, I apologized for yelling and offered to help them pick up all the toys. We did and every one returned happily to the table for lunch. Luckily, both of the boys were very kind and receptive to my apology.

After my fit of rage, I told the boys that I could have really hurt myself on their truck, that we really needed to try to do a better job picking up, etc etc. Both Nick and Jacob agreed. Nick then asked while tears are forming in his eyes who would take care of them if I were not around. He was obviously getting himself more upset even contemplating my absence.

I know one day, I will leave Nick, Jacob and Lyla. No one lives forever. Nor do they want to. Nor does anyone else want them to. I will say what I always say to Nick when he tries to impale himself doing some kind of crazy stunt: Nick, I want you to go to Heaven, just not today. So, I would also like to go to Heaven, just not today, or tomorrow, or anytime soon. :)

But surely, when I am in Heaven, I will wonder why I was trying to hang out here for so long.


Loukia said...

Awww... I yell all too often at my children, and feel terrible about it afterwards!
I hope you and your hubby have a great night! Can't wait to read all about it!

Lady Mama said...

Your boys are so sweet. And perhaps it's not a bad thing if every now and then they wonder what life might actually be like without you? ;)